Catching Myself Up

I have been mostly focused on my other blog...the first one...but I wanted to come over here and get caught up. I think I started this blog to make sure I could do it...I wasn't ready to fully commit on WildRumpusing.

Last year, in March and April, I participated in Nablopomo and I finished both months. I am doing it now in the other blog and I have been keeping the "I Did it" badges so I can tally the months I fulfilled my commitment. :) I am proud of the months I have been able to do it and I have refined my technique since the spring.

So, to honor my two months of Nablopomo here, I wanted to post my badges for April and March.

Nablopomo - April

Dear April Nablopomo-

I didn't do very well in the letter department. I think I'm going to take a month off of Nablopomo. I'm still in the Blog365 project, so I will post daily, but the whole theme thing is not as easy as I thought it would be.

I'm reading lots of stuff on blogs and art right now, so hopefully, that will help me reinvigorate for the blogs I'm working on.

Happy April!

I'm in Oakland

The hotel's computer doesn't type @ so I wasn't able to log in when I wanted to. Too much going on to really be able to say much right now. More later.

Out of town, last minute

I have to go out of town. I just found out today. No friends are there. :( I wish there were. Oh, well. I guess a change of scenery isn't such a bad thing. Right? Right?

I hope the hotel has internet.

Bad form?

Dear Reader(s):

Is it bad form to change the name of your blog?

I just made this one up because I couldn't think of anything with PINK in the title that wasn't already taken. Ha.

I will think about it. I know there has to be something I can come up with that represents me better or is more interesting...

Although I have noticed that if you have an "A" in the title and join a blogroll, people come and visit. I don't know how the Zs do. I should find out.

In honor of National Poetry Month

When I die, I want your hands on my eyes:
I want the light and the wheat of your beloved hands
To pass their freshness over me once more:
I want to feel the softness that changed my destiny.

I want you to live while I wait for you, asleep
I want your ears still to hear the wind, I want you
To sniff the sea’s aroma that we loved together
To continue to walk on the sand we walked on.

I want what I love to continue to live,
And you whom I love and sang above everything else
To continue to flourish, full-flowered:

So that you can reach everything my love directs you to,
So that my shadow can travel along in your hair,
So that everything can learn the reason for my song.

Pablo Neruda

Letter to April NaBloPoMo

Dear April NaBloPoMo-

I suck at the themes. I get all geared up and then I get busy or my mind goes elsewhere. I KNOW I could have done this better this month, but I was determined to write letters. When I started, suddenly, all the letters I have ever wanted to write dried up in my head.

I read a bunch of other blogs and they were going by letter in the alphabet...I wish I had thought of it sooner. I thought I had to stick with writing letters to someone instead of changing midstream. Sigh.

I'm glad I decided to join this month to keep me going, but I wish I had done a better job with the theme...

Jean

P.S. I am sick of politics. Will November never come?

Lessons

Ramblings...

First off, I am still disappointed that I started "Jean's Reading Renaissance" and I still have not really done any significant reading. How frustrating is that?!? I have just been too tired.

The other thing I wanted to just record here is that April has been a challenging month for me here on the blog. I think I am exhausted by the political scene - I listen to too much progressive radio and I think it gets me down sometimes. I think that kind of stuff really sinks into the subconcious and has a profound effect.

I love the idea of writing letters and the idea of focusing on a letter, I wish I had done better. I'm going to try to do better for the rest of the month. I just haven't been able to focus on anything. My mind has gone from the ridiculous to the sublime and sometimes I find it hard to marry the two...to ahve a post about the water crisis in the world and then complain about my day...So that sometimes hinders my creative mind because I feel like I can't reconcile the two things. It seems silly because I see it all the time in the blogs that I read and it isn't jarring to me.. I think it is kind of like mixed tapes - sometimes you start on one mood and then the songs lead you in another direction and sometimes the direction is happy and sometimes it isn't...

Anyway, thanks for bearing with me.

Letter to Oprah

Dear Oprah-

You are an amazing woman. I love that you have taken your incredible business sense and your ability to connect to people and put it to use in meaningful ways. "The Big Give" was an inspiration to anyone who watched. We can all do more.

Thank you for sharing your gifts and your passion. The world is a better place with you in it.

Jean

No letter today...

David archuleta - Imagine

Allies Retreat 08

"More than anything, an Allies retreat is a chance for Deaf people, CODAs and Interpreters to understand each other in a new way. We begin our discussions acknowledging that we experience conflicts. We acknowledge that the field of interpreting is, above all, about working with people who are Deaf. We are committed to creating a space to listen and learn from what Deaf people want to tell us. And we are committed to recognizing that we must examine how we have responded to the needs of our diverse colleagues and consumers.

We believe that talking to each other can make a difference. We're committed to having challenging conversation in a supportive environment. We believe that by honoring each of our cultures, we can talk to each other more effectively. We believe that our difficulties often come from assumptions about what we know (and don't know). By practicing dialogue with each other, with the support of our peers at the retreat, we can transform the sometimes challenging experience of Deaf/CODA/hearing relationships." - Quote from Allies 08 information posted on YouTube.

For more information go to www.allies08.com

D-PAN interpretation of "Beautiful"


To support D-PAN, please go to www.D-PAN.com

Imagining a different path...

DPAN Interpretation of "Waiting for the World to Change"


I was at an "Allies" workshop for Deaf people, CODAs (Children of Deaf Adults) and hearing interpreters. The goal of the weekend was transformation and possibilities for walking a new path as an ally.

Blast from the Past - 1984

lets go crazy

Musical letter

like a prayer – blonde ambition 1990

Ahhhh...

btvs goodbye to you

Tax Day

Dear IRS-

They are done. Mailed. Before midnight. Yay.

Dear SL

Dear SL-

Thank you so much for introducing me to the blog world. Even though it is not reading literature or a good juicy novel, it has opened my world and has allowed me to go back to a creative space that I thought I had abandoned. The other thing that I have been inspired to do by this journey is to be a better person and to explore ways to make the world a better place.

Clearly, I have been spending far too much time wandering from blog to blog, but I am enjoying it thoroughly.

So, thank you. In honor of my signing up for a Google Reader, I am going to post my blogaffairs that I have been conducting under cover of Sundays and without leaving many comments.

Wishing you creative days and lots of positive energy.

Jean

Letter to Water Drinkers

Dear Fellow Water Drinker-

Many of us take for granted that we could drink 8 glasses of clean water each day and whether we do that or we don't do that, it seems criminal that we don't even really realize (most of us) that so many people across the globe don't have the option... Even if they could drink 8 glasses of water, it probably isn't clean the way ours is.

So consider getting involved in providing clean water to those who don't have it. You can be pretty passive about it - just give money, buy water that will benefit a charity, etc.

Here are two great videos to give you more information:

Charity:Water founder


Jennifer Connelly - Charity:Water


Please help out if you can.

Letter from the past

So, I have been dealing with this whole storage space situation for several weeks now. Today, I went over to transfer the contents of some boxes into other containers as the boxes were old and squashed from the weight of 10+ years and other boxes that were old and squashed resting on top of them.

As I opened a big box that had been in the far back corner on the bottom (the last box I could get to when the space was full), I saw a bunch of spiral notebooks from when I was in college...and as I pulled them out, a thought occurred to me that I might find the notebook I had been searching for for many years - one I hoped to find and one I was afraid to find.

I found it.

It is a simple black spiral notebook. If you knew me at all, you would know that the color, in and of itself, is unusual for me. All the other notebooks were purple or had unicorn pictures or other designs on them, or at the very least, they were colored and had a bunch of notes to myself written on the cover. Not this one. Just plain black.

There were a bunch of loose pages in the front, but I was not interested in those. I turned to the very first page (also unusual for me to write on the first page - I always wanted a page or two blank in the front for privacy..if someone picked it up, they might not read it if it looked blank).

"Thursday, June 26, 1986 (technically June 27 at 12:09am)

The doctor told Roby he has AIDS. He called him at work and told him over the phone. Roby called me. He was crying so hard he could hardly talk. I picked him up from work. I felt so helpless. I didn't know what to say or how to act. All I wanted was to take him in my arms and hug all his pain away. But I couldn't. I felt a huge wall between us. I tried to put my arm around him, but he seemed to move away. I feel numb. I didn't cry until he told Jenny (M.) and Susan. I felt like I had to be strong. Susan fell apart and sobbed. Later in her apartment, she and I talked. I cried and she somehow knew that I needed for her to tell me it was okay. We talked for awhile. Roby loves her so much. So do I. Even Jenny and I talked. She held me when I cried and held my hand for a while. I felt as if we were friends just then.

I don't know how to feel. This has got to be a mistake. It has to be. I know this is selfish, but I don't want to lose him, I can't. Not now. Not ever."

I remember that I went to bed right after I wrote that. I put the notebook in my nightstand and turned off the lights. Later, my mother came home and checked on me as I was rarely in bed that early. She gave me a kiss on the forehead and closed my door after I assured her that I was ok.

The night that changed my whole life.